maybe i am just a Girl, Interrupted.

My movie of the day, I think. I am watching it right now and I have only seen it once before but I adore it, it is a wonderful movie. Crazy, to say the least but inspiring also. Winona Ryder and Angelina Jolie, two unbelievable actresses to begin with but this movie just brings them to a whole new level of amazing. The lead singer from 30 Seconds to Mars is in it too, can't remember his name though. He is quite pretty, not mad keen on the moustache.

Go watch it, go, go, go.

I wish I knew what I wanted to do with my life. What career I want to pursue, what courses I need to do to get there, where I want to go, where I want to live. The only thing that I am certain on, is who with. Nothing could change my mind on that decision.

Sleepy Times. G'Night. x

can you hear me?

I hate my boyfriend and everyone else who has coughed, or sneezed near me.
I have the sorest throat right now and guess what? Guess frickin' what!
I have to sing for an audition I'm doing tonight after school. :'(
I don't even know what song that I want to sing, I can sing.
I am not happy right now, I want to go to my bed and sleep forever and ever.
Then, after this terribly nerve wracking audition, I have work from half five till freakin' finish.
I am not up for life right now, not in the slightest.
I hope, after work, I get to see my lovely love, love love love.

I enjoyed Tuesday, immensely.
Town, I got euros for my holiday and went to The Mustard Seed for dinner.
It was delicious, most of all the strawberry and white chocolate cheesecake.
Arrrryum.
Liam bought me Series One of Flight of the Conchords, I should of been buying him presents!
It was very very sweet.
Watched it as soon as we got home, I adore it.
Now I have the set :)
Then, park meetings are always awesome.
I love Rob and Drew.
Darroch too.
Joe and Stuart, maybe Paul.
Liam, ehh yeah, he is alright.
Reading my more! man facts to them, hilaaaaarious.
Exchanging stories of all the funny times, not all were meant to be funny but still, they were funny.

Angus, being the cock he is, made me re-do all this and put in capital letters.
I hate capital letters! They aren't nice looking. I like everything to be in lower case, it makes me a lot happier, to be honest.
Anyone elso agree with me? No? Okay, I am weird.

I am re-reading The Wasp Factory by Iain Banks again, before I need to start to take some notes on it. There are a few bits that i completelly don't remember reading the first time. I must say, I am falling in love with this book, all over again.
Okay, love is maybe too strong and the completelly wrong kind of word for the contents of this book but you know what I mean.
I enjoy it lots.

I hate Angus.

nightmare.

im beginning to hate myself and my body.
because it hates me.
waking up all the time at three thirty am is starting to do my head in.
i am soo so freaking tired and i really really wanted a nice sleep and i was having one before i was forced awake by this agonising sore stomach and back.
some, shoot me please!
im glad ill get a long lie on saturday though, but i do want to see the games for a bit, never miss it.
a shleep with my sweetheart is what i need.
i feel positively minging.
i cant even lie down cos it hurts too much.
its just getting worse.
i need help.

my two new found loves.

number one.
are you my family? can i stay with you a while? can i stop of in your bed tonight? i could make you smile. in the morning i'll make you breakfast. in the evening i'll warm the bed and i'll always be happy to kiss you. promise i'll never get sad. i'll love you the best way i know how.

number two.
yeah, i don't care about time. i want you body and mind. yeah, we've got tonight and nothing left to lose. i don't have any answers, i'm willing to take chances. i don't live in the past. yeah, i care about you.

:)

one hundred and fifty.

i love quizzes, still do 'em on myspace :)
so, first day back at the old GUHS. how wonderful. severelly, NOT! it was a fun day, dont get me wrong, seeing all my buddies after the holidays, i missed them so much but it was painful :'(
i have to re-take higher history. i got 17/30 for my extended essay, 13/40 for paper one (because i only managed one essay because the questions were shiteeee) and 10/30 for paper two. ten? TEN?! that was the best god damn paper two i had ever had to sit! fuck this shit :'( :'(
i am just happy that i passed my english so i can do higher this year now.
psychology too, will be awesome.
not to say history wont be, i just madly wanted to advanced higher.

anyways, hows life?
im starting Friends from the beginning. only only episode four of series one but im getting there.
i hope that as i make my way through, i can slowly buy the ones i dont have.
:)

i am so tiiiiired, shhhhleeeeeepy shleep shleep.
and cooooold!
shnuggles? pweeese? :)

better than personal study work.

How many texts are in your inbox?
twenty-two.

When did your last hug take place?
around half three pm today, i would say.

Who was the last person you talked to?
my mum and brother in person.
Li Li in text.

Whats the first text in your inbox say?
i love you with all my heart x x x x x x x

When was the last time you smiled?
a bit ago.

Does anyone like you as more than a friend?
yes :)

Who was the first person you talked to today?
Liam, when i woke up and said morning.

Who do you feel most comfortable talking to about anything?
Liam and my friends.

What are you NOT looking forward to?
going back to school.

Are you a forgiving person?
yes.

What is something you really want right now?
a hug and a kiss.

How many TRUE friends do you have?
i have a few.

How late did you stay up last night and why?
i cant remember but i was out for a while so quite.

If you could move somewhere else, would you?
maybe.

Do you prefer to call or text?
i dont mind either.

Who took your profile picture?
Rory i think.

What is your ring tone?
Underoath - A Boy Brushed Red Living in Black and White.

When is the next time you will hug someone?
tomorrow most likely.

Are you wearing anything on your feet right now?
nat.

What are you eating?
nothing, just had a chinese for dinner though.
was delicious.

Who was the last person you texted?
Liam.

First person under J on your cell phone?
Jason.

Do you hate that person?
no.

Do you have any fun plans for tomorrow?
school . . . . yippee.

What's your longest relationship?
nine months.

Do you know anyone whose name starts with a Z?
nopes.

Who was the last person to smoke a cigarette in your presence?
Liam.

Is there anyone that you care more about than yourself?
most definatly.

How old is the first person on your top?
seventeen.

What does your last sent text say?
i love you.

Are you crazy?
sometimes.

What was the last thing you drank?
coca cola.

Are you happy right now?
extremelly.

What did you do today?
i stayed in bed watching Friends with Liam until half three then he went home and i went back to bed, ive played guitar, sorted my bag for tomorrow [i need a new one], listened to music, watched more Friends and Neighbours and Home and Away, started re reading The Wasp Factory [really should of done notes on that by now :/], cleaned my room, etc.

Do you like to smile?
i do yes.

Do you still turn to your parents for advice or comfort?
sometimes.

Have you ever been in a difficult relationship?
uh huh.

How old will you be on your next birthday?
seventeen.

Where is one place that you'd like to visit?
there are many.
the whole world please.

Who's the last person of the opposite sex you hugged?
Liam.

What sport do you watch the most?
ehh, none.

Would you ever consider piercing your lip?
no, not anymore.

Do you know anyone with the same name as you?
yes.

What was the worst mistake of your life?
im sure ive made a few.

Did you know anybody that has committed suicide?
no, i didnt, i dont think.

Who do you go to for advice the most?
im not sure, probably my friends or Liam.

What's the worst thing to happen to you today?
i burnt my eggy bread.

Is there a certain person that makes you feel safe?
sure is :)

How many people do you 100% trust?
a few.

Do you hate the last guy you had a conversation with?
definatly not.

What do you think of guys who have girlfriends but let other girls wear their hoodies?
i dont have a problem with it, if they are friends, its what you do.

If someone liked you right now, would you want them to tell you?
if they want to, but they cant expect anything from it, ive got my baby :)

Do you hate the last girl you were texting?
my Yve, noooo :D

What are you listening to?
Foo Fighters-Next Year atm.

Did you ever lose a best friend?
yes.

Do you use smiley faces on the computer a lot?
yah.

Last phonecall was from?
my mum.

Is there a girl that knows everything or almost everything about you?
yes.

Have you ever made out in a public bathroom?
nope.

If you could go back in time and change one thing, what would it be?
i dunno.

Did you ever sleep in the same bed with a member of the opposite sex?
i have yes.

Talking to anyone online right now?
nope.

Five hours ago, were you touching a person of the opposite sex?
yes, shnuggles.

Is there a difference between love and in love?
yes, of course there is.
everyone knows that difference as well.
you can feel that difference.

Do you have a brother?
a younger one yes.

Have you ever kissed anyone whose name started with an C?
yes.

When you take a drink of something, do you hold your pinky up?
yeah, i think i do sometimes.

Do you get along with girls?
yes.
probably boys better though.
i spend most of my time these days with guys.

Is there anyone who doesn't like you?
probs.

Do you laugh a lot?
i do.

Have you ever kissed someone that was high?
yes.

Was your last text from a boy or a girl?
boy, my boy.

Who was the last person to touch your butt?
Liam.

Do you think it's bad to have sex at your age?
nope.

Have you ever wished to live a day of life in the opposite sex?
i thought that i might be interesting, yeah.

Would it bother you if your best friend got naked at a beach or river?
no, not really, its up to them eh.

What is your favorite thing about the beach?
the freedom.

What is the first URL you usually type in when logging on to the Web?
myspace.
i have a routine.

Last place you went out to eat?
em, emmmmmmmmm, macdonalds?
no, morrisons, haha.

Have you ever kissed anyone whose name started with a J?
yes.

If your boyfriend or girlfriend was into drugs, would you care?
yes, i would care.

Have you ever hugged someone for over a minute?
yes,

Would you ever get a tattoo on your collar bone?
no, i dunno.
could be pretty.

Do you check your texts right away when you receive them?
when im not preoccupied.

Drum Banter.

so i was out last night with a bunch of lovely people, decided to play football. it didnt go too well, playing football while eating a lolly pop equals grassy mouths.
we decided we would go drinking instead.
a few people werent up for it so they went away and the group was Liam, Carl, Ja'mie, Angus, Paul and Pe-Pe. oh, and myself.
we played I Never which was mental. they didnt like that a girl was there. you can pretty much say anything in front of me, i dont really care. then we bet on who would win rock paper scissors and whoever lost the bet, drank. we then decided that it would be quite fun to climb on the roof of the pavilion. it was pretty scary but i was drunk, i handled it.
after a wander down to the shop, we bumped into four German tourists looking for booze so we gave them a sip of Pauls whisky, which was minging. Carl made me drink it by saying if i didnt then he wouldnt come to see Paramore with me :'( so i had to.
the best part is yet to come. when Paul and Jamie began to play fight, that turned as real as you can get. Carl steps in to split it up and gets punched in the face by Paul who straight away goes 'Carl, im soo sorry!' when Carl goes 'Right, thats fucking it.' and starts up the fight. so all the boys get involved in breaking up this fight. punches are flying and so is Pe-Pe clinging on to Jamies back.
the funniest thing i have ever seen in my whole almost seventeen years of being alive.
i just decide to stay back with the Germans and watch them stop fighting.
they ask me 'Is this usual for Drumnadrochit?' and after pondering this for a second i say 'Yes.'
when the fight finally stops, the boys walk over, laughing and patting each others backs as if nothing happened. mentalists.
it was a good night, we drank a lot and i am chuffed, i dont have a hangover! :D
never happened to me before, i always get hangovers. maybe it was the scrambled eggs i ate before i went to bed.
maybe cause Li Li kept me safe :)

school tomorrow?
no thank you. i really really dont want to go. i dont even know what im going to be doing. i hate this. nooooooooooo.

Chandler Bing.

my favourite Friends character, i think. i am up at twenty minutes past five in the morning watching series five of Friends. fuck off stomach pain :'( i only have four more series to collect to finish off my collection. i have one, three, four, five, eight and ten. they are still ridiculously hilarious to me. there are a lot of people who are like 'ah, total gone off it now it has been overplayed.' i say no, it will never be overplayed for me. keep going with the playing. im watching the ones with Ross and Emily. he is getting worried that Emily might be gay with Susan, like what happened with Carol. Pheobe just found out that she is having triplets and has been giving the choice to name baby number three. Joey and Chandler are fighting for their names to be chosen. Chanoey? nahhh. GO WITH CHANDLER! i love him. i do love Joey too though . . and Ross. really, i love all six of them! in all different ways. Joey is cute, Pheobe is just wonderful! i want to be bessies with Rachel for free fashion and Monica for the food but Chandler, i am in love with Chandler. deeply, in love. i think it is his humour that i am drawn to, maybe that he is so pained and unsuccesful that i want to just run up and shnuggle him.

okay, a tad ridiculous now. i woke up at half three with this pain and it is now five thirty five am and it is still hanging on strong. i took paracetamol at some point and it didnt help one teeny tiny bit. so i put on disk one of series two Flight of the Conchords and it didnt take my mind off anything. all it did now was get that 'going to a party, sippin' on bacardi' too many dicks song. they do have some ridiculously funny songs. which brings me to two other men i am well and trully in love with.

Bret McKenzie and Jemaine Clement, they are so naive and little. they make me smile lots and lots. i just adore their songs, 'mazing. i like Murray too, he is just gorgeous! even if i knew the characters i would still fall in love with them, it is the accent. i dont know why they dont get all the girls in the programme, they should. Mel doesnt count.

Ross just got an earring! looks . . . .good? im not mad keen on earrings on men, plugs, yes. well, i guess it would depend on the guy, eh. that reminds me, i need earrings. i have two pairs that have their backs and arent broken. all my necklaces are fucked too! they all get tangled in my jewellery box.

i want to go to America, ive heard that it is an amazing place and i want to go to the big comic shops.

pain pain, go away, come again another day.

or never.

that sounds better.

audience and audio.

i hear that i missed a hell of a performance by Twin Atlantic at Belladrum, gutted.
cannot beat last years though when everyone was made to sit down, ahaha, LOL.
i just bought my ticket for their gig at the Ironworks on the 11th of September, it is going to be good. its nice that it is on a friday, after party? ahhh, ya!
i was going through all my photos that i have saved and i saved loads of Berlin ones from beebz.
i miss the old days. we were mental.
i miss Berlin a lot. it was an unbelievable holiday. i have soooo many memories from it. good times :)
bored.

geeeeee aye.

Movie of the Day :
the best action movie that i have ever seen. no jokes. saw it at the movies just this morning and loved it! not only does it have the gorge Channing Tatum in it, it also has the stunning Sienna Miller kicking serious ass! mmmm, i know what i wanna do when i grow up, be a Joe :P

five months today baby (: almost half a year! long time eh. i am cooking dinner this evening, hmmm, hope i dont end the relationship on the account that i kill us. i made cheesecake yesterday, are you meant to put sugar in the filling? och well, tastes fine all the same. i took one to poor wee sick Drew to say get well soon, so scared im going to make him worse :/

i might get a job as a secretary or something. i quite enjoy typing, i used to be faster than i am now though. thats why i like blogging, i get to type :)

Scorpion King is on anytime and i am being forced to watch it. i will wait till my dad falls asleep and switch to Brideshead Revisited because i have wanted to see it for quite a while.

what should i wear tonight? the clothes i wore to the dance maybe? i dont really have any other nice clothes. i really need to get some. i am already being mocked for my disastorous cheesecake making skills by people who havent even tried it yet.

its good!

not really, i used jam for the top. you only get the highest class from me.
five star :D

my house is freezing. our boiler broke which also means i have to use a crappy electric shower that is just, rubbish.

i hope the rest of my cooking goes a little better (yn)

£6

if only i got a pound sterling for ever pound of weight i put on.
id have £6. half a stone in four weeks, not pleased. the treadmill is being purchased.
i, so far, have worked 24.25 hours this week. nine hours in one day, yesterday, a lot for me! im chuffed though, i gotta save for going to Glasgow, for going to Lanzarote, for when i start learning to drive, for Christmas, for birthdays etc etc.
is it wrong that i didnt find Radioheads new song terrible? dont hate me Liam.
my brother just told me he hates Florence and the Machine's - Rabbit Heart.
i think i might kill him.
the P.E.S.T remix is soo much better, eh Rory (:
i really need yto start making notes on The Wasp Factory for when i go back to school, since i can do English :) quite pleased.
exams are pish and should all go away, for ever. no no no.
im off to tescos, food shopping.
num.

bag of nerves.

FIFTH YEAR EXAM RESULTS : ONE SLEEP!
fml. i am not happy with my efforts this year, tbqh. i could of done so much more. next year though, ill try better. although, i did say that last year :/ i am excited about going out tomorrow night though, with my friends from work (: Pizza Express.
s'all.